Who says you can't laugh in Ahwatukee?
At it's core, the Ahwatukee Clean Comedy Club (ACCC) is all about community—and nothing brings people together quite like laughter. This event focuses on clean stand-up comedy, making it ideal for audiences of all adult ages and backgrounds. It’s a chance to escape the stresses of daily life and connect with others through the universal language of humor. From witty one-liners to hilarious storytelling, the comedians aim to deliver laughs that everyone can enjoy. The club’s cozy, intimate setting ensures that every seat feels close to the action. And because it’s a BYOB (Bring Your Own Beverage) event, you can customize your experience with your drink of choice while supporting a local venue dedicated to fostering creativity and fun. And if you like pop corn you can get Stacey Culver's delicious pop corn for FREE!
Other Laughter Sites you might want to visit....
AhwatukeeComedyClub Click Here ArizonaLaughterNews Click here
Thank GOD there's a name for this disorder. Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.
As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, And notice that the can is full. So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first..
But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my check book off the table and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Diet Coke I'd been drinking.
I'm going to look for my checks, But first I need to push the Diet Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. The Diet Coke is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the Diet Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need water. I put the Diet Coke on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.
I decide I better put them back on my desk, But first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.
Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.
Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.
At the end of the day:
The car isn't washed, the bills aren't paid, there is a warm can of Diet Coke sitting on the counter,
The flowers don't have enough water, there is still only 1 check in my check book, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day, and I'm really tired.
I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll better check my e-mail....and FaceBook.
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SOME WOMEN ATTENDED A SEMINAR...on how to live in a loving relationship with their husbands.
The women were asked, "How many of you love your husband?" All the women raised their hands.
Then they were asked, "When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?
"Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some couldn't remember.
The women were then told to take out their cell phones and text their husband - "I love you, Sweetheart"
Next the women were instructed to exchange phones with one another and read aloud the text message they received in response to their message.
Below are 12 hilarious replies. If you have been married for quite a while, you understand that these replies are a sign of true love. Who else would reply in such a succinct and honest way?
1. Who the hell is this?
2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
3. Yeah, and I love you too. What's wrong?
4. What now? Did you wreck the car again?
5. I don't understand what you mean?
6. What the hell did you do now?
8. Don't beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?
9. Am I dreaming?
10. If you don't tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.
11. I thought we agreed you wouldn't drink during the day.
12. Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn't she?
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An elderly woman died last month. Having never been married, she had
requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her
memorial service, she wrote.... "They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I
don't want them to take me out when I'm dead!"
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Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother,
"Why is the bride dressed in white?" The mother replied: "Because white is the color of happiness,
and today is the happiest day of her life!" The girl thought about it for a little while and then said:
"So why is the groom wearing black?"
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Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards.
One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said: "Now don't get mad at me.. I know we've been friends for a long time but I just can't think of your name just now. I've thought and thought but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is. Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes. She just stared and glared at her. Finally she said: "How soon do you need to know?"
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Below some "OneLiners" you might enjoy
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This is the first article Ahwatukee Foothills News wrote about the comedy club 2005
Take a look at this English translation of the Beijing hotel brochure below:Getting There:"Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests."The Hotel:"This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with them self."The Restaurant:"Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you."Your Room:"Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity! You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts."Bed:"Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers."Above all:"When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it."Love and Light
9 Important Facts to Remember As We Grow Older
#1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today
might burn your butt tomorrow.
#2 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.
Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
#3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays
no attention to criticism.
#4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in
the hospital, dying of nothing.
#5 Give someone a fish, and you feed them for a day. Teach
them to use the internet, and they won’t bother you for weeks, maybe even
months or years.
#6 Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they
can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
#7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which
one can die.
#8 Life is sexually transmitted.
#9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
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